I made this mess into neat little yarn cakes on Wednesday! Last night, I knit a big swatch (uh-huh, a swatch!) and it will soon be time for pencil, paper, calculator and (probably) Excel! Now, I'm not 100% sure I'm going to knit this exactly as written -- I'm thinking that I'll still knit a raglan but I may do it in pieces, from the bottom up, rather than on a circ from the top down. The circs and I just don't get along and nothing would spell UFO to this sweater more than c-i-r-c-u-l-a-r. (My Tivoli -- which isn't even called that anymore -- is a
shining tarnished tarnishing example.) Also, while I'll be using the same Fibonacci sequence for the stripes, I will be using seven different colors of yarn rather than five, in this order (I think):
Dark Green/Gray, Orange, Tan, Rust, Spring Green, Red, Gold
I'm still working on Trellis -- knitting both fronts at the same time. I didn't get to the sock last night, and eventually I'll have to stop ignoring the shrug...
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My brother called me last night. I think he missed me!! I'd been worried about the ride home -- he had to wear the brace and it's over an hour from the hospital to their home and it's spring in Wisconsin (which means that bumps in the road and potholes are EVERYWHERE!). Apparently, I needn't have worried because he told me that he actually fell asleep in the car! I'm chalking that up to my SIL's good driving and Michael's apparent ease in a motor vehicle -- not remembering, but being aware of what happened to him (he has not seen any pictures or read any accounts of the accident, and doesn't want to yet -- not 'til his bones heal -- or maybe never, but he does ask questions about it and talk about it from time to time). There was a very happy reunion with his dog. Said dog was curled up at his feet when we spoke, hadn't left Mike's side -- except for a walk, which Mike meant to do, but he'd fallen asleep. Sleep and rest are still so very important.
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So, who knows? Cassie's post, The secret life of a blogger, was interesting to read the other day; she wrote about things that cross my mind frequently -- some more than others, some more lately than previously. I started to leave a comment, but, as so often happens, I was distracted, and now it's much more than a comment... more like a big, ol' ramble!
My kids know about the blog, but Katie's the only one who reads -- and it's semi-regularly, at that (and I am thrilled beyond all reason when she leaves a comment). DH knows -- he thinks it's cool and has even met some of my "blog friends," but he is not a regular reader (I'm not sure he could even find the blog). I kept the blog secret even from them -- the people I live with -- for a while. I eventually told one of my sisters after about a year. She
told blurted it out to our dad (of all people!) and to my youngest sister (who is very envious of my "blog friends" and wants some of her own) and to some of her friends -- they all think it's cool, but completely overwhelming. None of them read very often (some -- dad? -- maybe never). The blog is not really a secret, but I've learned that -I- would rather be the one to tell people about it, if I want them to know. None of my "real" friends know. I, too, have all these new "knitter friends" from the far corners, and I, too, have more contact on a regular basis with some of them than with "real" friends, and I, too, have traveled to meet up with them -- I've got to wonder (too) where my mom thinks they've come from...
I shot daggers at my sister the first time I heard her mention my blog to someone (dad). All sorts of thoughts ran through my head and she retorted, enthusiastically, "What? It's you and it's fun and you haven't written anything to be ashamed or embarrassed about." She was right -- and now I can't. ; )
At first, I was quite cautious about my identity and location, careful about photographs and things. Not that I've actually spelled it out anywhere, that I know of, but I'm not bent on complete and total anonymity. I think I'd make an excellent detective or secret agent -- I can keep secrets and be very stealthy and hold things close to the vest -- I'm quiet and cautious and a little shy, but I'm just not secretive, and I don't blog that way; it's not a natural approach for me. I know my blog personality is a little different than my real life personality -- I can be a little more "out there" on the blog -- but, you know, I'm ALWAYS fooling myself into thinking that I'm "out there" ALL the time, in ALL my personalities, and I'm really not. (I'll bet y'all really want to meet (all of) me(s) now, huh? Heh.) I'm such a stick-in-the-mud wallflower and I always have to push and stretch myself to participate! However, I do have it on good authority that I sound different on the blog. ; )
Yeah, yeah, about my kids and the dangers of the internet and all the bad people... well, I don't live my life in fear, either. In fact, I refuse to live in fear and I have never modeled that for my kids; caution, yes; knowledge, yes; communication, yes; fear, no. You better believe I am sometimes afraid -- sometimes frozen with fear -- for my kids, myself, my neighborhood, my world -- and, oh, it would be so much easier to be a hermit... but that's not living. I live, I blog, I blog (some of) what I live.
Six weeks ago, my brother was in a terrible accident and I blogged it. I blogged most of it (not all) every day of the however many weeks in ICU, the surgeries, the rehab and recovery -- I couldn't imagine not blogging at all and there was nothing but that to blog for a while; those were my only choices. I briefly questioned whether I should. Because of the blogging, he will soon be the recipient of a blanket made up of squares knit by many knitters, spearheaded and sewn together by the generous Christine, in conjunction with a blanket project she had going for her brother. It's one thing when I receive the occasional package in the mail from a blog friend, but how in the world was I going to explain an entire blanket for my brother? Everyone watched me knit the single, solitary sock in the hospital waiting room, they know it isn't even BLUE. (Abracadabra! Let me pull this sock out of my hat...!) I couldn't just present a blanket out of thin air (and, besides, I want to tell my brother about the squares and the knitters!), so I told my SIL about both the blogging and the blanket. Not only that, I copied and formatted all my blog entries about the accident and what I'd written about my brother and printed and bound them for her to read (and eventually share with my brother) -- and I also offered to delete or modify them online if, for some reason, she wanted it that way (thank goodness, she didn't). Yep, handed her the blog on a silver platter.
I both censor what I write here and I don't. This is not the place for airing out any of my laundry -- maybe on another blog. This one is mostly about knitting and, most of the time, how knitting relates to my life and, in some ways, about how knitting has changed my life -- the new friends and the travel. The dreaming... My sister is right, though, I have nothing to be ashamed of here. Some people may not really get it, might even think it's stupid, but hey, whatever; the tables can always be turned in that game.
So, those are some of my thoughts on my blog -- and the who and the what they know. Interestingly, I still have not told my mother, in so many words, about the blog. Mom hears talk about the blog, she hears my sister lament the lack of blog friends (and sis knows it's directly related to the lack of a blog), she knows about the blanket that "my knitter friends are making," and she was with me when I bought the pink yarn for Grace's blanket squares the other day -- if she has questions, she's keeping them to herself.