A declaration
Paper shredders hate me.
If it's not the hidden fake credit card in the junk mail (that's what did in my first), it's the folding-in-upon-itself-multiple-times-wrinkle causing the 8 sheets the thing claims to be able to handle to become more like 32, coupled with my knee-jerk reaction when the telltale SCREAM begins to REVERSE, STOP, FORWARD, REVERSE, STOP, PU-U-U-U-L-L-L-L-L that jams all those little shreds of paper in there real good.
That's what did in my second, and is currently threatening my third -- a barely three-week-old, bright, shiny, self-contained, diamond-cutter with which I was hoping for a long and happy association.
Harumph. I haven't even had a chance to try out the dedicated slots for credit cards and CDs.
It happened on Friday and I thought maybe, with the weekend, things would loosen up a little. Ugh. I am digging in there (carefully) (and stealthily) with a letter opener (don't worry, the shredder is off and unplugged) as best I can to coax and pry the little bits out and HOPEFULLY salvage this damn thing. I refuse to requisition another shredder!! Not to mention that the boss probably won't be the one paying for it, if you know what I mean.
What's testing your patience today?
I have been known to take tweezers to the shredder. Unplugged of course, but I am still nervous.
Normally I can list a bunch of things that try my patience, but so far nothing. It's still early, but the baby and the dogs are oddly behaving very well. I call it the calm before the storm. :-)
Posted by: Oiyi | 10 November 2008 at 12:27 PM
Whatever you do - DO NOT ever use 'canned air' to clear any paper in your shredder. My SIL unplugged her's at the bank she works at and used the canned air to clean out all the little pieces and it caught fire and flashed back in her face. She singed her hair and eyebrows. The static electricity in the machine sparked the canned air.
Posted by: Karen | 10 November 2008 at 02:07 PM
One of the benefits of a wood stove is that I can throw all that stuff in there and burn it up.
Posted by: Carole | 10 November 2008 at 02:12 PM
If you haven't already, you should watch the movie, "Office Space".
There's a lovely scene where they beat the crap out of a printer. It gives me great joy.
Posted by: Steph VW | 10 November 2008 at 03:13 PM
We are so blithely non-paranoid that we have no paper shredder. (Hope those are not famous last words.)
Posted by: kmkat | 10 November 2008 at 03:18 PM
My office has a bin we through junk mail and papers into and once a month the nice man from the shredder company drops by and takes it all away. I don't miss the shredder drama ONE bit!
Posted by: margene | 10 November 2008 at 03:30 PM
SPAM is trying my patience. The kind that looks like you sent it to yourself. :headdesk:
Posted by: Geek Knitter | 10 November 2008 at 03:54 PM
I can not tell you how many times I have had to dig out paper from my shredder. I am on my second one. The first one was actually taken apart and put back together and it lasted a little longer. I have torn up all my nails, ruin knives and pens digging into the teeth of that shredder. I feel your pain, I feel your pain. Good luck and remember to breath and take breaks!!
Posted by: Kasia | 10 November 2008 at 04:29 PM
Trying my patience? My dumb ear, and the pain it's causing my head. I am quite annoyed at it at the moment.
At least it's not the kids right now- school has the girls, and the little guy has the sweetest smile right now- hopefully it stays sweet, and doesn't turn sneaky on me,
Posted by: Gretchen | 11 November 2008 at 09:02 AM
I recommend you get a decent but not expensive pair of needle-nosed pliers to keep in your desk. They definitely speed up the preocess.
My only real annoyance so far today is allergies of an unexplained origin. And that they made me crash and burn before I posted last night so my streak only lasted through the 9th.
Posted by: KarenJoSeattle | 11 November 2008 at 02:51 PM